I can I know

(Also, specifically in the wrong order):

Fell in love with a cat

Went ice skating

Traveled to Thailand

Quit school

Turned 30 years old

Went snorkeling

Gained 60 pounds

Lost 70 pounds

Took a rat to a vet in NYC during a pandemic

Lost the will to live

Attempted suicide

Appreciated nature

Traveled to Bali

Found the will to live

Had a panic attack while driving

Felt proud of myself

Spent time in Vancouver

Made new friends

Celebrated my birthday

Cruised to Alaska

Cruised to the Bahamas

Did an ice bath

Threw a birthday party for my rats

Did many more ice baths

Attended a dance class

Called customer service

Stopped counting calories

Floated in a pool for 3.5 seconds

Lost my faith in humanity

Embraced the sand

Hiked 3 mountains

Lost a grandparent

Got a new job

Discovered I love durian

Went on a date

Tried seafood

Peed behind bushes

Stopped straightening my hair

Attended a party

Cried in public

Asked for help

Ordered from a menu in under 5 minutes

Returned to Bali

Found my home

Saw the sunrise

Ran

Joined a gym

Cried at the gym

Started journaling regularly

Got a new therapist

Cried over internet pets I’d never met

Said no

Said yes

Started a blog

Meditated

Cleaned my room

Learned Bahasa Indonesia

Grieved my pet rats

Cried over Jello (the cat)

Loved a puppy

Loved another puppy

Left Zionism

Lost people

Gained people

Discovered what joy feels like

Completed an intensive therapy program

Took mushrooms

Shared a secret

Made choices

Kept going

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